Greenfield Park Victim #28 ~ Anonymous

Hi Mike,
I stumbled across “Moe’s Dream” web site and thought I should put my thoughts down.
Back in nineteen sixty through sixty-two or so I was an altar server for Father B.
I have been sitting here staring at the screen wondering how to do this. How do I say this? I have only ever told one other person in all these years.
It happened to me also.
My most troublesome memory is the feeling of being trapped. Not being able to get away.
The good Reverend would call my mother and arrange to pick me up at home if I did not agree to go with him voluntarily.
When this was happening I was talking to a friend while walking down the street. I told him I didn't know how to stop what was going on. His problem was that he was wondering if the proper way to be measured for a jock was to have the gym teacher cup your package in his hand. That was the end of our conversation and the last time I told anyone until now was my wife.
One time I remember some women in Greenfield Park discussing the rumour that Bockus liked boys and that it was a vicious lie. I wanted to yell at them that it was true.
Reading Dave Houle's letter, I am glad for him. Boys like Dave Houle were able to walk away because he was an in-your-face kind of kid and braver than me. Most of us were more timid and obviously more easily manipulated.
I don't know what else to say.
I feel sadness for the Bockus family but these crimes went on for so long and affected so many the details were bound to come out.
The pain sits just below the surface and is difficult to bury. Those years have affected my whole adult life.
Like Bill Knight said, your personal relationships suffer. How you love, how you husband and how you father. Is this the real you or is it a facade put up to hide the real you? After all you participated.
I applaud those who are coming forward. I suppose some want revenge, some closure, some just want to go on record.
Personally, I would like the pain to go away.
Its still there and can still bring a welling up of the eyes.
You’re doing a fine job at something that needs to be done. You will be thanked and cursed at the same time no doubt.
I hope this proves to be a cathartic experience for everyone involved. After all the years of holding it in there needs to be a release of some sort.
And everyone wants that street sign to go away.
This well known GPK Victim was not sure about coming "out".
We discussed it on the phone ... along with a hundred other great things ... boy, he charged me emotionally, a battery that needs that often these days, since Moe is gone from booting me on and as so much crap is revealed ... anyway, it is not a case of GPK and the world at large being better off knowing who he is, that is not the problem, it is his immediate family.

His testimonial says it all, his identity will make no difference, so lets leave it undisclosed.